How was it that Friday could be our last day together? You told me not to forget to ask him if he still liked you. Well I did and he said yes. But when Monday came you weren't there. I can still imagine to this day how happy you would of been, you would of put that big smile on your face and said "Jess, are you serious?" That smile that could make even the devil be happy. I remember getting mad and school and walking into the bath room and see you holding a cigarette and smiling. It would brighten my whole day.

I couldn't wait to get on the bus that Monday to see that smile. Making you happy would of made me so happy too.

You never knew it, but Rachel I was in love with you.

I knew you had some problems, but we all do. You were trying to straighten out ember you promised no more drugs.

I guess you broke that promise. It killed me that Monday. Everyone was crying. I didn't believe it what I heard. I never go to say good bye. You were only 17 and you were doing so good. You were really trying. I didn't believe what they were telling me.

No, not Rachel

We all didn't want to believe it and I still want to know why

I still love you. Even though you lied to me you said you would stop. I knew it would kill you. FUCKING HEROIN. But you are in a better place, your just like Jenny. I never got to say good bye. I never thought I would have to, your life was going to be so perfect, you and him back together.

And me loving you more and more everyday. Now I cry when I think of you. I cry when I imagine what life is like everyday without you.

I love you and I miss you Rachel. We will be together someday again.

Jessica